From a son who is very thankful to his mother

My name is Bruce and I was adopted when I was six months old in Boston, Massachusetts. I never met my birth mother but always wanted to. Yes, I wanted to meet her to see if I looked like her, to hear her voice and to give her a hug. But most of all I wanted to thank her for having the courage to give me life. She could have had an abortion and I never would have had the chance to live. My adoptive mom and dad would not have had the chance to tuck me in at night or to read a book to. I would not have had the chance to ride a bicycle or to drive a car. I would never have had my children or even see my grandchildren. But my birth mother had the courage to go through with the pregnancy.

I tried to contact her through my adoption agency when I turned forty years old but my birth mother didn’t want to see me. I didn’t understand why she didn’t want to see me and it hurt me very much. I cried many times about this. I even got mad about not being able to meet her but I got over it. I had thought a lot about her when I was growing up, what she was like and what she was doing at the time that I was thinking of her. I prayed for her every year on my birthday. Why wouldn’t she want to see me? I resolved to leave it up to God.

Then recently I was contacted at work by the adoption agency that I was adopted through. They called to let me know that my birth mother had passed away and that I had siblings, four sisters who wanted to get in touch with me. I was really taken back by this news. I wasn’t even thinking about it much at the time and had really put the whole thing on the back burner. I was so excited over the news that I could barely work. I went home to email my new found sister Ellen with great anticipation. I found out that they had stayed with my mother and they were all older than me. So I had to ask, “Why was I adopted”? The news hit me like a ton of bricks. You see, the woman who brought me into this world was the victim of the horrible crime of a violent rape and I was the result. All the time that she was carrying me, she must have thought of that horrible night yet she had the courage to carry me! I can understand and sympathize with her over the pain and agony that she went through and I understand why she did not want to see me.

I am more thankful for my birth mother now than I ever was in the past. She spared my life! It would have been the easy way out to abort me and to try to rid her memory of that horrible night when she was violated and disgraced. If I were to see her now I would run up to her, hug her, and say over and over “thank you, thank you, thank you”.

I don’t know where you are at in your life or the circumstances of your pregnancy. If you were raped, then I am sure that you are very hurt, and going through a lot of emotions. I want to let you know that there is a child inside of you who will one day be thankful to you for their life. There is a baby to be held and loved, to be brought to a carnival, tucked into bed, to ride a bicycle and drive a car, to see their children and grandchildren. It takes courage and love to press through the pain and to do what is right. Adoption is a wonderful option that allows you to know that your child will be taken care of even if you are not able to raise him or her. Take it from one who knows.

I never did meet my birth mother and I never did hear her voice or hold her hand. I never did have the chance to say thank you to her. But on behalf of the little baby that you are bringing into this world, I will say thank you to you with all of my heart for having the courage to make the right choice and allowing your baby to live.